He Watches Me by Tammy Nicole Glover

He Watches Me by Tammy Nicole Glover

“Behold the fowls of the air: for they sow not, neither do they reap, nor gather into barns; yet your heavenly Father feedeth them. Are ye not much better than they?” Matthew 6:26 KJV

I woke up this morning at four o’clock. It seemed to be for no other reason than my bladder holding me hostage from sleep. I dragged myself to the bathroom and my mind immediately started to flood with worries. I could feel my chest tighten and my breathing become labored. Anxiety was rearing its ugly head. I took a few breaths and told anxiety, “not today, in the name of Jesus.” Outside, I could hear birds chirping away. The sun wasn’t even up yet but they seemed to be singing praises to God.

I remembered just three years ago, waking up at 4am. Instead of hearing birds chirping, I heard satan’s lies. Overcome with depression and anxiety, all I could hear was, “you’ll never get out of this situation. You would be better off dead.”

I was so deep in sin and so far away from God, it was easy to believe the lies. At that point, I thought God hated me. I believed if I died, I would be in peace. Mercifully, God was still watching me. One day, I heard His voice telling me to repent and be baptized in His name. There is no peace apart from Jesus. I realized He still loved me.

Love isn’t seeing someone walking towards the edge of a cliff and looking the other direction because that’s what they want, and it seems to make them happy. I was at the edge of a cliff. I thought falling off would make me happy. Instead of looking the other direction, Jesus called me, and I answered.

Now today, at four in the morning, satan is still trying to convince me to kill myself, but this time, spiritually. The difference this morning, is I’m baptized in the name of Jesus, filled with His Spirit and I have a heart to serve Him and be Holy. This morning, the still small voice of Jesus inside me is louder than the enemy’s. I clearly hear Jesus saying, “I am in the midst of you, daughter. Abide in me and I will abide in you. Apart from me, you can do nothing, but in me nothing is impossible.”

God’s eye is indeed on the sparrow. I know He not only watches me, but He is in me. I hear the birds praising God in the darkness and I’m praising along with them.

I’m Still His (Revised) By Tammy Nicole Glover

I’m Still His (Revised) By Tammy Nicole Glover

As read on Balm for the Soul with Tammy Nicole Glover podcast.

When they said I was worthless because my skin wasn't light enough, my hair wasn't long enough
And my face not pretty enough
I was still His.

Though they laughed at me when I dared to expose my dreams and said I was crazy
I was still His.

When I was scared, mistreated and overwhelmed
And when the pain and loneliness made it difficult to breathe
I was still His.

When my pride took over and I thought I could do life on my own
When I tried to ignore His voice and searched for what I thought was better
I was still His.

There's no more denying the truth.
I have been the liar, He is the truth.
There's no where to run or hide.
I was His before I was formed in the womb.
Now, there is only the decision to either remain in Him or to be lost in the darkness.

I decided to remain in Him.
To accept and follow His commands.
To trust completely in His ways.
To stay humble before Him and grateful for His mercy.

He owes me nothing and I owe Him everything.
I am completely His
A daughter of the Most High God whose name is Jesus.

Incomplete By Tammy Nicole Glover

My life is not complete without You, Lord.
I don't need to see it to believe it
A life without Christ, I can't conceive it.

It doesn't matter where I go
Or who I know
If it's not in You, it's just for show

No matter how high I climb
Or how hard I grind
The Lover of my soul is always on my mind.

All for His glory
The beginning and end of my story.
No eye has seen nor ear has heard
All He has in stored hasn't been explored.

I want to let the world know
It's not about cars, money or fame
God's treasures puts all of that to shame
Gonna lift Him higher
Staying close is my desire.

My life is not complete without my Lord and Savior.
My Eternal Friend
Who has granted me so much favor.

Who am I, Lord, that You are mindful of me?
Spoiled and broken
Your selfless love has captured me
Cleansed and restored
I'm Yours for all eternity.

Am I Thankful? By Tammy Nicole Glover

Am I Thankful?  By Tammy Nicole Glover

This time last year I was sitting on the kitchen floor in tears. I was overwhelmed with the new responsibility for being the primary caregiver for my mother, holding down a full time job and grieving for my sister who had passed a little over a month prior. I was angry with God, angry with my family and friends and angry with myself. I felt alone because I didn’t let anyone know how much I was hurting and struggling. Although I didn’t have a plan to hurt myself, I truly didn’t care if I never woke up again. There were some days, I was actually disappointed I had woke up.

As I sat on the floor, exhausted and frustrated that I had spent a whole day cooking a dinner that no one was coming over to eat, I decided I was going to take a break from God. I was too tired to keep trying. If He truly wanted me, He was going to have to come and get me. Life after that went downhill. I had no idea how crazy and challenging 2020 was going to be for the whole world. It looked like God had given up on me and the rest of the world.

Around August, God came and got me. I rededicated my life to Him but this time I completely surrendered my life to Him. I let Him in every area, not just the nice parts. I wanted to be an open book for God. Although I was aware that God already knew everything, it was still difficult being honest about how I felt about Him and myself. I still wasn’t truly sure about the depths of His love for me and I found it hard to trust Him. Little by little He started to heal me. Healing is a painful process and I’m still going through it.

This Thanksgiving, despite all of the heartbreaking events and challenges, I can truly say I am thankful. I have a peace that transcends understanding. I have unspeakable joy. I have hope and faith again. Dreams have been restored. I know God truly loves me and cares about every detail of my life. I now wake up and I’m thankful that He has given me another day because it’s another day I can share the love He His given to me with someone else.

The fact that for a lot of people, this Thanksgiving Day will be one the most difficult days of their lives hasn’t alluded me. Many are grieving the lose of loved ones. They are without jobs and don’t know if they will be able to eat dinner. They feel alone and unloved by family, society and God. Even as I type this, there are some that are contemplating suicide. I’m thankful today to be able to tell them don’t give up. God loves you and He has a plan for you. It’s not to hurt you but to give you hope and a future.(Jeremiah 29:11) Please keep fighting because you have no idea how close you are to a breakthrough. I know it hurts, it’s scary and it’s lonely. You’re never too far away and it’s never too late to go to God. His door is always open. Joel 2:32 says, “But everyone who calls on the Lord will be saved.”(NLT) There’s always hope and there is always help.

“You have turned my mourning into joyful dancing. You have taken away my clothes of mourning and clothed me with joy, that I might sing praises to you and not be silent. O Lord my God, I will give you thanks forever!” Psalm 30:11-12 NLT

Helpful Resources:

National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-800-273-8255, suicidepreventionlifeline.org

NAMI Helpline: 1-800-950-NAMI (6264), M-F 10a-6p ET or email: info@nami.org; for free crisis counseling 24/7 text NAMI to 741741; additional resources available at nami.org

If you’re in the Metro Detroit area and are looking for mental health assistance or Biblical counseling, feel free to check out GACCS (God Almighty Christian Community Services); gaccs.org; (248) 847-3600 or (313) 247-8315

If you have a prayer request, you can email requests to balmwords@gmail.com

Perspective By Tammy Nicole Glover

A couple of days ago, I was feeling sorry for myself and I started complaining about how unfair my life was on social media. I got a few likes and comments because who isn’t going through something, right? Knowing that I wasn’t alone in my misery felt so good until I saw some of the people commenting. I knew that some of them were dealing with things that make my issues look like a joke. I’m talking about truly unimaginable, life altering issues, yet, they still took time to encourage me. If they knew what I was complaining about, they could have gotten offended and let me have it, especially since I knew what they had been dealing with and probably hadn’t called to check in on them.

At that moment, I had to ask God for forgiveness because at the end of the day, I’m blessed. What I should have posted was: Thank You, God that even though I’m dealing with some things that I don’t understand and I think is unfair, You’re still with me. You are still merciful and patient. You still love me. You are greater than my problems, my drama and my temper tantrums. You are not a God of chaos or confusion but a God of peace. These light and momentary troubles will last for a while but Your love and Your faithfulness will last forever. I know that the plans You have for me are to prosper me and not to harm me.

Now, this would not have been a popular post but I wish I had the boldness to have posted it anyway. In the middle of trouble we can never stop praising God. It’s not the trouble or the problem that we’re thanking Him for, it’s the help, peace and wisdom that He provides. Know that the moment we turn over our problems over to God, the battle is won. We may not see it immediately but it’s done-yes and Amen. Just give Him the praise for it.

“I will extol the Lord at all times; his praise will always be on my lips. I will glory in the Lord; let the afflicted hear and rejoice. Glorify the Lord with me; let us exalt his name together.” Psalm 34:1-3 NIV

The Beauty of Closed Doors By Tammy Nicole Glover

“‘For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways,’ declares the Lord. ‘As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.'” Isaiah 55:8-9 NIV

When a door is closed on an opportunity that we’ve spent a long time hoping for, the last thing we want to do is to give thanks and praise to God. We typically want to ask God why He isn’t making good on His promises to us. We feel rejected and hurt. After several closed doors, we start to feel like giving up. We start thinking that maybe our dreams just weren’t meant to come true.

Sometimes our feelings of disappointment can hinder us from seeing the blessings in front of us. When we have a dream in our heart, we can become so consumed with our own ideas of how and when things should happen. We forget that God’s plans are always bigger than what we can ever imagine. His line of sight goes far beyond ours, which allows Him to see troubles and obstacles down the road that we can’t see. He knows the pain we may experience when a door is closed may pale in comparison to the pain we would experience if He allowed us to walk through that door. A lot of those doors we wanted open would not only have set us back but could have taken us out entirely.

Another thing we tend to forget is that God’s timing never matches our own. We may think we’re ready but God knows we have more growing to do. The blessings He has in store for us usually require us to be more spiritually mature because they come with greater responsibilities and even greater battles. God’s plan is always for us to succeed. He doesn’t want to put us in a position that would cause us to fail. If we walk through some doors too soon, we may not be ready for the challenges that come along with them and we could decide to give up and walk away.

Never be ashamed of a closed door. Always give thanks to God because you know in your heart that God has your best interests in mind. If you come across a closed door, know that God has an even better door for you to walk through around the corner.

“‘For I know the plans I have for you,’ declares the Lord, ‘plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.'” Jeremiah 29:11 NIV

A Reminder to My Future Self By Tammy Nicole Glover

“They saw that the fire had not harmed their bodies, nor was a hair on their heads singed, their robes were not scorched, and there was no smell of fire on them.” Daniel 3:27 NIV

Dear Future Self,

So, another problem popped up and threatens to overcome you. Don’t panic! You’ve been through this before. It may be a different problem that looks bigger but God has not grown smaller, nor has He changed. He is still the Lord God Almighty, who has promised to never leave you nor forsake you. He is still the God who promised to supply all your needs according to His riches in glory. Don’t forget His commandment for you to be strong and courageous. Don’t be afraid or discouraged. He is with you. (Joshua 1:9)

My beloved future self, don’t doubt God’s love you. He has not removed His mighty hand from you. Surely, you can remember how He delivered you from the last crisis. He not only restored you but He placed you in an even better position than before. You were so blessed that you were able to help those around.

Dry your tears and be of good cheer, for Heavenly Father sees all and will answer your call. God is good, faithful and full of endless love and mercy. Now, is not the time to have a pity party. It’s time to praise God for your victory.

“When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and when you pass through the rivers, they will not sweep over you. When you walk through the fire, you will not be burned; the flames will not set you ablaze. For I am the Lord your God, the Holy One of Israel, your Savior.” Isaiah 43:2-3 NIV

Through the Valley

Although the valley is dark and terrifying things keep jumping out at you, don’t stop walking through it. It’s not the time to become paralyzed with fear, nor is it the time to contemplate the fairness of your situation. When you are in the valley, you must keep your focus on God’s promises. As He directs your path give Him praise because on the other side He has an amazing blessing prepared just for you. Don’t allow the enemy to keep you from what God has planned for you. Go through and get your reward.

“Even though I walk through the darkest valley, I will fear no evil, for you are with me.” Psalm 23:4 NIV

Keep Praising

Don’t stop praising God, especially during a time of crisis. Late in the midnight hour, during your praise, chains will break, storms will be calmed and lives will be restored. God inhabits the praises of His people. Your praise is a precious commodity. It’s your most powerful weapon against fear.

“About midnight Paul and Silas were praying and singing hymns to God, and the prisoners were listening to them. Suddenly there was such a violent earthquake that the foundations of the prison were shaken. At once all the prison doors flew open, and everyone’s chains came loose.” Acts 16:25 NIV

ARISE by Tammy Nicole Glover

Why so downcast, oh my soul? The Lord woke you up this morning. He kept you safe through the night. His sun shines on you. His favor covers you like your favorite blanket.

It’s time to rise and shine. What happened yesterday has past. Today is a new day, full of new blessings and new mercies. Arise and be of good cheer. There is much work to be done by the Lord’s people.

Open your eyes, the world is hurting. Open your ears, the earth cries out. Open your heart and accept God’s assignment. He has given you strength, peace and joy. There is no need to be downcast, oh my soul. For your Heavenly Father is with you today and forever. He has promised to take care of you and to protect you. Your Heavenly Father is El-Shaddai-God Almighty. He is the Creator of the Earth. There is no one and no thing greater than Him. He parts seas. He heals the sick and raises the dead. He sent His Son, whose blood cleanses you of all sin. He has conquered death surely, He can handle your problems.

Praise the Lord, oh my soul, for He is good and His love endures forever. He is generous, not only with His mercy, but with all that is His to give. You are His child. Arise!

“Why, my soul, are you downcast? Why so disturbed within me? Put your hope in God, for I will yet praise him, my Savior and my God.” Psalm 42:5 NIV