Why Me? By Tammy Glover

“Blessed is the man who perseveres under trial, because when he has stood the test, he will receive the crown of life that God has promised to those who love him.” James 1:12 NIV

Why me? Why do I have to deal with cancer? Why do I have to have a family member struggling with addiction? Why do I have to be the strong one? Why do I always have to be the responsible one? Why do I have to continue to face one crisis after another? Why can’t things just ever be easy and I can have some peace? Why does everything have to be such a struggle?

The response: Have you looked around lately? You’re not the only one going through something. Some people are going through worse things than you are and they don’t have the support or resources that you have. If I told you about what some other people are going through, it would blow your mind. These are people, who just like you, are walking around looking like they have it together. A lot of them however, don’t even know me. You know me. You know I’m faithful. I’ve proven it to you time and time again. I never promised that things would be easy. You’re not up here in heaven with me yet. I did however, promise that I will always be there to help you. Now, stop focusing on what your physical eyes see and open your spiritual eyes. Can’t you see my angels surrounding you, constantly standing guard over you? I have prepared the way for you, now you have to trust me. I am the Lord your God. I am your Heavenly Father. You are my child and I love you. I take care of all my children. I need you to be a testimony of my love so that the people who are struggling, that don’t know me, will get to know me through you.

“I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do everything through him who gives me strength.” Philippians 4:12-13 NIV

I Missed You By Tammy Glover

“For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.” Romans 8:38-39 NIV

I missed you, Lord. I didn’t know if you were still listening to me anymore. I felt so alone. I prayed. I begged. I pleaded. I fasted and yet, my situation never got better, it only got worse. There were times when I wasn’t sure if I was truly thankful to have woken up in the morning. Your silence was as painful as what I was going through. I thought, how could you abandon me during one of the worst times of my life.

Finally, the thing I feared and prayed to avoid happened. “Where are you,” I cried out. “Did I offend you in some way that you would allow this to happen to me? Did I pray right? Did I fast enough?” My grief was so bad that I just couldn’t think straight anymore–maybe that’s why I can’t hear you.

Eventually, I heard a whisper. You were still with me. I couldn’t see or feel you then but now I know. I was never alone. When I didn’t think I had the strength to hold on another day but somehow I made it through, I know that was you. When I cried alone at night, it was you who heard me. It was you who would urge someone, who didn’t even know what I was going through, to give me a word of encouragement or a hug.

Even though you didn’t answer my prayers the way I wanted them answered, you still heard and answered. The answers were according to your will, which is perfect.

We may not always know the why behind the what but we can be sure that it is always in your hands, Lord. There is no darkness that your light can’t penetrate, no enemy that you can’t defeat, no sickness that you can’t heal, no broken heart that you can’t comfort. We just need to trust you. To be perfectly honest, the hardest thing to do when you’re going through something is to give up the illusion that you’re in control. How great you are, Lord, that even in the midst of our troubles, you still bless us and that your arms are always open and patiently waiting for us. It’s good to be back, Lord.

“Be strong and courageous. Do not be terrified, do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.” Joshua 1:9 NIV

BUT GOD… By Tammy Glover

“They were at their wits’ end. Then they cried out to the Lord in their trouble, and he brought them out of their distress.” Psalm 107:27-28 NIV

Fear gripped my heart. Worries left me confused and weary. My eyes were swollen from the constant flow of tears. Deceived into feeling like I was alone, I was ready to give up, too beat up to fight anymore–but God stepped in.

He took my right hand and pulled me to my feet. His eye was always on me. His arms are firmly wrapped around me. His light illuminated all the dark areas of my life. His love strengthens me. His Word refreshes my soul.

I trust in Him, the One who is mightier than any problem. He wipes away my tears and whispers in my ear, “I am here. I have not and will not forsake you. I love you.”

Praise God that through Him all things are possible, even freedom from my worries.

“I love the Lord, for he heard my voice; he heard my cry for mercy. Because he turned his ear to me, I will call on him as long as I live.” Psalm 116: 1-2 NIV

HELP HER TO REMEMBER by Tammy Glover

“In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness.  We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groans that words cannot express.  And he who searches our hearts knows the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for the saints in accordance with God’s will.”  Romans 8: 26-27 NIV

Father, your daughter needs you.  She has taken on the burden of worry, a burden which she was never meant to carry.  She has become weak and confused.  This burden has left her vulnerable to believe the lies of the enemy.  Lord, she needs your help to remember who she is in your Son, Jesus Christ.

Lord, help her to remember that she is your daughter, precious and beautiful in your sight.  You always hear her when she cries out.  You have never left her side.  Not one of her tears has gone unnoticed.  Help her to remember that nothing is impossible for you.  Help her to remember that in her weakness you are made perfect. 

Don’t let her forget that you are faithful.  Help her to remember that she walks by faith and not by sight.  Although, she sees the evil of this world, she is not to be moved by it.  She is only to be moved by your Word.  You did not give her a spirit of fear but of power, of love and of a sound mind.

You are the same God who guided Sarah, Esther, Ruth and Mary.  You are the same God who raised Lazarus from the dead.  You are the same God who gives sight to the blind, hearing to the deaf and mobility to the paralyzed.  You are El-Shaddai–God Almighty and she is your daughter.  Every time she is blessed, you are glorified.  Every time she is healed, you are glorified.  Every time she is delivered, you are glorified.

It is because of your love for her that fear is cast out.  It is your love that has saved her.  It is your love that comforts and strengthens her.  It is your love that gives her wisdom.  It is your love that redeems her.  It is your love that sustains her.  It is your love that helps her to remember all of this.  Your love restores peace to her soul.  May your daughter continue to remember to praise you and never forget your promises.

“Blessed is she who has believed that what the Lord has said to her will be accomplished!”  Luke 1: 45 NIV

EVEN THOUGH By Tammy Glover

“For God did not give us a spirit of timidity, but a spirit of power, of love and of self-discipline.” 2 Timothy 1:7 NIV

Even though I’m scared, I still forge ahead. Even though there is rain, the sun is still peeking behind the clouds. I’m aware of my past and sometimes, I may glance back, but I never linger there too long. I may feel lost but God has already found me.

Even though there are tears in my eyes, I still praise God. Even though I’m exhausted, I still have strength to lift my hands to Him. Even though I’ve lost my voice, my heart still cries out to Him.

I can’t rely on my own understanding. I can’t rely on what I see before me. I must only rely on what God has promised me and what He has said in His Word. He is not like a man that he should tell a lie. He has never forsaken me. He loves me even though I’m a mess. No matter what the circumstance, I am still truly blessed.

“I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do everything through him who gives me strength.” Philippians 4: 12-13 NIV

SURRENDER By Tammy Glover

“My father, if it is possible, may this cup be taken from me. Yet not as I will, but as you will.” Matthew 26:39 NIV

Lord, when I heard your call, I was excited and a little scared. I knew you were calling me to greatness, not so that I could receive the glory but so that you could. I felt honored and blessed. I forged ahead not realizing exactly what your plans entailed.

I expected things to happen immediately. I expected an always smooth path. I expected complete clarity. However, as I went along, I realized that I had to wait, and wait, and wait, and wait. As I waited I became anxious and unsure. Did I hear you right? Maybe, I just needed to move things along a little faster for you. Maybe, you forgot about me. None of these things were true. What I had to understand was that there were preparations that needed to be made and things that I needed to learn while I waited.

Deep inside, I think I knew this but I didn’t want to go through the hard stuff. I didn’t want to go through rejection and strange looks from other people. Why couldn’t I accomplish your plans and remain normal? Why did I have to learn how to forgive? Why did I have to learn to be humble? Why did I have to learn to overcome my fears? Growing hurts and it’s hard. I wanted to do things my way and reap all of your rewards. I realize that this is impossible.

Lord, I surrender. I will listen when you say stand firm, even though I’m in the middle of a storm. I will be patient when you say be still. I will press forward when you tell me to walk on water, despite how scared I am. I will say what you want me to say and I will trust you. I will forever praise you.

“Many are the plans in a man’s heart but it is the Lord’s purpose that prevails.” Proverbs 19: 21 NIV

PEP TALK By Tammy Glover

“You hear O Lord, the desire of the afflicted; you encourage them, and you listen to their cry.” Psalm 10:17 NIV

Now see here, this pity party has gone on for far too long. You are not a failure. You are not worthless; you were wonderfully created by the Most High. You are so important to God that he knows exactly how many strands of hair that you have on top of your head. He did not spend all that energy on creating you just so that you could give up now. You have not spent all this time having faith in him to lose heart. God gave you a dream for a reason. You don’t have to understand it now. Has he ever done anything for no good reason? Who are you to set God’s time table? Who are you to question his plans?

I know things suck right now. I know you’re frustrated, hurting, confused and stressed out but you are so close to your dream, you just can’t give up. Don’t you know that’s exactly what Satan wants you to do–to give up? Do you really want to give him that satisfaction? There are always wounds during a battle but God is a healer. I know you’re tired but God can renew your strength.

Stop magnifying your problems and magnify the one who is greater than your problems. God will do what he has promised. He doesn’t lose. You are not alone in this. God even has people praying for you when you can’t seem to pray for yourself. Now, pick yourself up, dust yourself off and shake off that doubt. Lift your head and hands up and start giving God the praise that he deserves!

“We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair, persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed.” 2 Corinthians 4:8-9 NIV

“You turned my wailing into dancing; you removed my sackcloth and clothed me with joy, that my heart may sing to you and not be silent. O Lord my God, I will give you thanks forever.” Psalm 30: 11-12 NIV

THY WILL BE DONE By Tammy Glover

“Yet not what I will, but what you will.” Mark 14:36 NIV

I’m constantly at war with myself. My spirit wants to follow God’s will but my flesh wants to do it’s own thing, and so begins the battle. My spirit wants to love and forgive despite how I’m treated but my flesh wants to curse and fight. My spirit wants to give freely but my flesh wants to hoard everything for itself. My spirit wants to be proactive but my flesh wants to procrastinate. My spirit wants to praise God for my blessings but my flesh wants to complain about my problems. My spirit wants to trust the Lord completely and to not be afraid but my flesh wants to doubt and hide. My spirit wants to rejoice but my flesh worries that people will think I’m crazy. My spirit wants to write and share this blog but my flesh doubts that anyone will be encouraged by it.

Sometimes, these battles between my spirit and my flesh overwhelm me. I get exhausted and want to give up, but quitting is not an option for me. I didn’t come this far to go back to the life I used to live. I can’t forget how much God loves me. He loves me so much that He gives me grace and mercy each day. He gives me the strength and encouragement that I need to fight these battles. He loves you just the same. He sees your struggles. He knows how hard this fight is. He wants you to know that He is with you and with Him all things are possible. He loves you and He will never leave you nor forsake you. Don’t give up. Keep praying, believing and following God’s will for you. He will never break His promises.

“Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is–his good, pleasing and perfect will.” Romans 12:2 NIV

WALKING ON WATER By Tammy Glover

“Then Peter got down out of the boat, walked on water and came to Jesus. But when he saw the wind, he was afraid and, beginning to sink, cried out, ’Lord, save me!’” Matthew 14: 29-30 NIV

It’s cold and dark. I’m surrounded by water. I see a magnificent light in the distance. It’s Jesus telling me to not be afraid and come to him. His arms are outstretched and waiting for me. I step outside of the boat and walk towards him on the water. I’m amazed at this miracle and I feel truly blessed to have been chosen by the Almighty.

There are others that have remained in the boat. They’re begging me to come back and to stop acting foolish. They’re telling me that I’ll surely drown if I keep going. It’s impossible to walk on water. The Lord tells me to stay focused on him for with man this would be impossible but for God all things are possible. I keep going but my own fears and doubts have added to the fears of the other people on the boat. I take me eye off the Lord for a second to look down at the water below and my fears overtake me. I can’t see how deep the water is because it’s too dark. The wind is becoming stronger causing the water to become choppy. I start to feel the icy water cover the tops of my feet. Overwhelmed with fear, I cry out to the Lord and immediately I feel his steady, strong arms wrapped around me. Why did I ever doubt him? He always does what he promises. He never leaves me nor forsakes me. He is my shepherd. His light chases away all the darkness. His love strengthens me.

I am no longer sinking. I am doing the impossible. I am walking on water with my Savior, my Healer, my Provider, my Best Friend–Jesus.

“When I said, ’My foot is slipping,’ your love, O Lord, supported me. When anxiety was great within me, your consolation brought joy to my soul.” Psalm 94:18-19 NIV

TRUE WISDOM By Tammy Glover

“If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him.” James 1:5 NIV

What is true wisdom? Wisdom is recognizing that you don’t know everything. It’s accepting that you’re not perfect. It’s admitting that you have made a mistake and that you need help. It’s seeking out and listening to those who have walked down the same paths successfully. It’s taking responsibility for your mistakes and not blaming others for the consequences of those mistakes. It’s learning from your mistakes.

True wisdom takes true humility and patience. You have to be humble and submit to God. You have to trust and know that his ways and timing are perfect. Wisdom is not putting God in a box. It’s realizing that God provides wisdom in all forms. It could come from an expert, a friend, a family member or the simplicity of a child’s words. Before shunning someone’s advice, pray, it may be the Lord speaking through them.

True wisdom is seeing the things in your life that hinder you from receiving answers. It’s being able to not only recognizing and pointing out the faults of others but recognizing and pointing out your own faults. Are you selfish? Are you bitter? Are you prideful? Are you arrogant? Are you greedy? Are you lazy? Are you afraid? Are you jealous of others? Are you stuck mourning the loss of a dream? Do these things prevent you from rejoicing in the blessings of others?

I know these are ugly words. They sting and your first response may be to become defensive. You might even be tempted to look at the person next to you with accusation but try to fight these urges. It’s ok if you see these things in yourself. Trust me, you’re not alone. True wisdom sees and asks God to remove these things from your heart. It recognizes that you will become better by His grace.

True wisdom is a rare gem. It’s priceless and it can be hard to find. It does not seek you out but you have to seek it.

“Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him and he will make your paths straight.” Proverbs 3: 5-6 NIV