“For Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.” 2 Corinthians 12:10 NIV
Every day, all day, I am constantly faced with the questions, do I have enough energy to take care of my elderly mother alone? Do I have enouth motivation to do my job? Do I have enough talent and wisdom to do what God has called me to do? Do I have enough faith that will please God?
As you can probably imagine, running these questions around inside my mind all day is tiresome. I want to believe that I have enough but at the end of my exhausting day, I arrive at the same answer. I absolutely do not have enough of anything. This answer devastates me. To come to the truth that I am not enough makes me question why I’m even here.
I cried out to God, “why me, Lord,” in the most dramatic fashion might I add. In the middle of my crying and full blown pity party, I heard the Lord ask me, “do you believe that I’m enough?”
“Well, of course I do, Lord,” I answered. “You are Almighty, All Powerful, All Wise. There is nothing you can’t do.”
“Then the real question you need to ask yourself is, do you believe that I love you enough,” He said.
What a question, indeed. I admit I have developed some serious trust issues. People have disappointed and hurt me so I’ve depended on myself. My mistake was evaluating God based on their actions. Let’s be real, God isn’t even remotely close to being in the same category as us humans. His Word clearly says that He is not a man that He should lie. We lie to each other and ourselves all the time. Even His actions show that He’s not in the same category as us. What have we truly created without His help. He is the Creator of all. So why would I trust Him in the same way I trust humans?
God’s very essence is love. He created us in love, to love Him and each other He loves us so much that when we, as a creation, fell into sin and turned away from loving Him, He gave His Son Jesus as a sacrifice on our behalf, just so that we could be reconciled to Him. He wants so badly to have a relationship with us that His Son took the punishment that was meant for us. Now, these are things just written in the Bible. What if I look at all the things He has specifically done for me?
There were plenty of times I should have died, plenty of situations that should have broken me and plenty of betrayals against Him that should have disqualified me from being a part of His family. Yet, His never ending love for me kept me alive, healed my broken heart and qualified me to be His daughter. Even now, in the midst of my struggles, He’s still there, patiently lifting me up when I stumble. The mere fact that He answered when I called out to Him during my pity party, shows His love for me.
Yes, God I believe You love me enough. I don’t have to be enough. Your love for me has given me access to Your mercy, power and wisdom. I have enough in You.
All praise to the God of More Than Enough.
“My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” 2 Corinthians 12:9 NIV